I Am a Woman

I am a woman and the objectification that comes with that and the opinions or thoughts of this concept means that I am demoralized, whorish, too fat/skinny, and there are more societal expectations simply because I have the misfortune of getting my period and growing boobs in the second grade.

I am a woman who when I posted a picture of myself in my bikini top that showed my boobs, I had my best friend (at the time) walk up to me and say… “Why?” I didn’t know what she meant at first, I didn’t realize she had judged me because I showed my boobs in a picture. Because apparently, as a woman, I am expected to have boobs but never, ever admit or show them. Apparently men don’t realize girls have boobs until they’re displayed but still feel the need to make fun of flat chested girls.

I am a woman who, when in Elementary school, had incredibly large boobs compared to the rest of the people in my grade which lead to rumors that I stuffed my bra and apparently, the concept of an Elementary student getting a boob job makes perfect sense because I was asked on a regular basis if my boobs felt real. Well, duh.

Not only that but I was once approached about my boobs by a boy and he looks at me (because apparently my face is located on my boobs) and said, “I know why you have big boobs, it is because you’re fat.” But let’s be honest, that is a totally different topic in itself (that I will cover!)

As a child who is a woman, I dealt with this backlash a lot but apparently it is surprising that I hate my boobs and my mother tells me, “Oh, you’ll change your mind. They are just jealous because men will love you.” My friends tell me, “Oh, you’re overreacting.”

Let me ask you this, how would you feel if you were harassed for years about the fact that you had boobs, would you love them? Would you want to show them off to the world and be super proud of them? Hell no, because let’s be real the only people proud of their boobs are the girls who grew boobs late in life when it was already normal.

But now as I am older, 17 in fact, I have realized that my boobs do get me into interesting situations. I can say happily that I have gotten free drinks by admittedly ugly cashiers at Starbucks and on multiple occasions received free food from the guy behind me because he didn’t want me to pay. Oh, the perks. Not only this but when I bought multiple packs of sodas, a man came up to me and asked me if he could help put them in my car because I was a girl and when I said “No, thank you,” he watched me and every time I came back, he asked again. Not because he was being polite but because I am a girl who is expected to be weak.

What made me angry about these situations was when I got into a relationship and he watched this happen to me on a regular basis and I realized this never happened to guys. We were at a sushi restaurant and the guy gave me free Green Tea Ice Cream because he thought I would like it and totally ignored my date (who I would share this ice cream with!) It is so cool to receive free food but let’s be real, it’s really degrading. (Not saying I want this to stop but I mean, come on, get a life boys!)

I am a woman and immediately there are things expected of me, especially in my looks. Apparently I must have big boobs and no thigh gap and let’s not forget that I am a “lesser person” if I don’t have boobs or if I am not less than 100 pounds (Sweetie, that ain’t ever going to happen!) 

I mentioned earlier that I was told the only reason why I had boobs was because I was fat? Because apparently if I do have the ideal boobs, that is a bad thing because I am too fat for a guy to enjoy it.

In middle school, the teacher started talking about obesity and how girls should weigh a certain amount and she points to me and says, “You’re obese. You will never find a guy like that.” Before you freak out, she is now in jail for having sexual relations with a student. (Monica Lewinsky, anyone?)

But my problem isn’t that she pointed to me and said I was obese, my problem is the assumption that the only reason why I am alive is because I need a guy in my life. We live in the 21st century and yet, I am still seen as vulnerable and weaker by the world. We will IGNORE the fact that the only reason why male birth control studies ended was because of side effects that women birth control already have proving we have a higher pain threshold (not to mention the watermelon that can come out of our bodies!) Yes, I am a weaker person. So sorry!

Do NOT expect me to get married, do not imply that the only reason why I am alive is so I can pop out children and populate a world where we are sexualized and have to fear for our lives because of our clothes. Now, let me get one thing straight, when I want kids or if I have kids, is my business and does not make me less of a woman one way or the other.

My mother recently separated from her husband (whom I despised with every fiber of my being) and do you want to know what one of her customers said? “Why would you do that? Are you moving in with some other guy? Girls can’t live alone.”

Do I need to make a sign that we live in the 21st century, like is that the problem here? People forgot that we have already passed the stone age?

I am a woman who has a dress code because I distract other boys. People make a big deal about shoulders not being allowed to be seen but did you guys know why? APPARENTLY, if you look at the shoulder, you see a bra strap (The horror, we have boobs!) which makes you think of the bra and then makes you think of boobs. This distracts boys from their lessons and they are not reprimanded because “boys will be boys.”

How about I make this suggestion, teach your boys to control themselves instead of taking girls away from their education so we can help the male population? Besides, boys get distracted by everything. My shoulders are going to cause less of a problem than if they looked two inches below and simply looked at my boobs. Not to mention if a girl bends over, wears tight shirts, wears a skirt, wears leggings, wears jeans.

If boys are going to get distracted, there is no way avoid that so stop ruining girl’s educations simply because they can’t keep their dicks down (Excuse my crude language because apparently girl’s can not know those exist!)

Then you have the expectations of what we should wear, we are not allowed to wear short shorts however that is the only way to get a guy’s attention. You are expected to wear tight clothes so we can show off our assets or otherwise we are hiding ourselves yet if we do and something happens. We are blamed.

Apparently if I wear a shirt that is tight and shorts, it is my fault if I get raped. Because I was “asking for it.” I was talking to a Freshman (I am a Junior) and she pointed to an older student and said, “Her dress is so short, she is just asking for it.”

Women are told we must dress a certain way and if we don’t, we are hated and if we do, we deserve whatever comes to us. We will ignore the self control that these men clearly need to learn and we will ignore that I can wear whatever the hell I want to wear.


I am woman who has grown up with this idea of what I should look like, I should weigh a certain amount, I should have the certain breast size, I should want children, I should live my life so I can get married, I should work in a place “suitable for a girl.”

There are so many expectations that women face yet it still surprises everyone when we are insecure and rebellious towards this behavior and when we fight for this equality that we have yet to completely obtain, we are reckless, ignorant, and thoughtless of the world around us.

We are told that we are girls and because we are girls, we have to keep our pretty little mouths shut and put on some make up and just do whatever the man wants.

There are so many expectations in the world of women yet if you turn on the television and you watch a single show or movie, you will notice a stereotype that is made fun of and joked around with. Women are thought to be make- up wearing, boy obsessed shoppers. Those women, the women that follow society’s expectations, are then mocked for these very things.

I am a woman and because of this, there is this dreaded one week of my life. A week that means that I have my menstrual cycle (also known as PMS!) This week is mocked, ignored, made fun of, and joke obsessed. The people making these jokes have nothing to do with the people that experience this.

If we are slightly (even slightly) rude or annoyed with a boy, you are faced with this sentence, “Oh, you’re on your period, aren’t you?” However, if I talk to a guy about this, I am immediately faced with this, “Gross! I don’t want to hear that! You’re disgusting!”

Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize that you could make jokes about it but you couldn’t handle the actual situation that causes stomach aches and is in general incredibly annoying! By the way, if you want to know what a period is like by your own gender boys, here you go!

That will take you to a Buzzfeed Yellow video of the Try Guys experiencing Periods, girls, it is incredibly funny to watch this and is kind of amazing to watch!

Women are NOT equal and if you are a woman who believes this statement, I highly recommend you rethinking it. Women are demoralized, expected, and treated like we are less simply because we have the misfortune of having periods and growing boobs.

Ignoring the societies thoughts on women (for just a second), we are paid less per hour on a regular basis, we are told that we are emotionally unstable, and we are physically weaker. May I ask what that has to do with ANYTHING?

Regardless of how our brain works, we shouldn’t be treated different. Men are more likely to be serial killers because of their lack of empathy, what if I told you that you couldn’t have any guns because of this? How would you feel?

I am a woman who demands equal pay and equal respect between a man and a woman. I should be given the same job offers and the same rules given by those allowed to. Our world has been fighting for Women’s Rights for years! None of this has changed. I am a woman that deserves to be respected for my choices in life.

I am a woman who is smart, creative, and opinionated and yet I am told that I am a woman and therefore my opinion does not matter. I am a woman that is not okay with this and everyone who respects, relates, or understands this fight should fight also.


Published by

Sabrina Ingram

Hello, my name is Sabrina Ingram. I am the author of The White Butterfly and The Girl in the Cage. You can find me on my website (www.sheswritingmore.com) where I talk about writing, books, personal things, and much more!

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