I would first like to begin by saying, that as someone who has anxiety, the ways that you can help me versus how you may be able to help your significant other may be drastically different. These are not bullet- proof tips for everyone in the world, but they could give you an idea of how to approach the situation. But if you really are at a loss and none of these tips are working, talk to your partner. At the end of this, I will be linking different websites discussing the same topic for those of you who do not find this article useful.
It is important to understand their anxiety. For everybody, the root of their anxiety can be different and for some, it may be generalized anxiety or social anxiety. Maybe their anxiety could be connected to a different issue altogether, like PTSD.
Things you can do to understand:
- Get them to talk
- Notice their triggers
- Stay calm and kind
- Be there for them
You might find them asking you questions. They might want to know when you’re driving and when you’re safe. They may ask you to reassure them and when I say this, trust me. They hate that they feel this way. They hate that they have to know that you’re okay. They hate having to ask the questions but here is something very important to understand:
Their brains hate them. That’s how I’ve already described it to my boyfriend. Their brains are telling them the most horrible things, reading into something out of nothing and remembering the weirdest conversations and noticing the slightest differences. They will get this vibe during conversations that something is off and they have to know what the difference is.
Now every time I see that Tumblr post that says, “More tips to date somebody with anxiety,” or something like that, people are always talking about the fact that some of these things are ridiculously clingy and are signs of unhealthy relationships.
I’ll admit that the clingy thing has merit but it’s not the sign of an unhealthy relationship. Demanding to know your locations at all times and wanting to know that you are safe are two totally different things. People with anxiety fear both of these things, they don’t want to come off as clingy and they definitely don’t want you to feel like you’re in an unhealthy relationship so if that is something that you feel or don’t like, then please don’t continue on just because you feel bad for them.
People with anxiety don’t want to trap you and they don’t want you to be unhappy. So please, if this is how you are feeling then don’t stay in the situation. Making this decision is hard and honestly, I have a hard time believing anybody could ever want to love me and I feel this is a common feeling among a lot of people with anxiety. If this is not something you can handle, they would likely understand.
But please, don’t lie to them and lead them on. Don’t tell them you can handle it when you can’t, don’t tell them that it’s okay if it’s not.
It’s not impossible to date somebody with anxiety but I’m not going to tell you that it’s easy. But if you’re willing to date them, then hug the beautiful person and tell them that it’s okay. Tell them that you will try and help them in anyway that you can. Tell them that you’re trying to understand and start a line of communication. Do they know their triggers? Do they know how to handle their anxiety? Do they have anything they want you to do when they’re struggling?
Start the conversation. That’s the most important thing.
Other sites that may help you!