I Am a Proud Mother of Apple – My Ferret


So, to be completely honest. I absolutely adore all animals. Whether they are soft and furry, scaly, or even just insects. I have always been interested in animals and obsessed with them at that.

Another important aspect of my character is that I am absolutely obsessed with research, I am obsessed with knowing every little thing about any one single subject. When we first moved to a new house, I obsessed over getting a Black Moor Goldfish and obsessed over the perfect tank mates and the right foods and all the right supplies. I put my all into knowing everything I could that at this point, I can look at any single fish and know exactly whether or not they are sick or not which was really helpful when a few months ago, my two Black Moor’s both got ick at the exact same time.

With this fact being known, please don’t start fighting with me in the comments over any of my following choices and revelations as in all honesty, I will listen but in the long run, I probably won’t follow any of your suggestions (depending on what they are) because trust me when I say this, I did my research.

So for as long as I can remember (also known as when I watched Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire for the first time) , I have always been in love with ferrets. When Alastor Moody transfigured my dear Draco Malfoy into a ferret, I have been completely and utterly in love.

However, it was not until a few months ago that I really took any of my love for ferrets seriously and began to do the research and when it comes to ferrets, you delve deep into that research. You learn about the tricks they can learn, the temperatures they prefer, the amount of time they need, their natural personalities, the foods they need, the treats that they like that are food for them. You learn everything you can and pretty fast because people seriously do want you to learn and know everything you can.

Research has especially become easier due to YouTube though no, this was not my main form of research and yes, I did use various channels and information to perfectly understand what I was being told.

But really, I don’t want to talk about the care and what you’re supposed to do or what you’re not supposed to do though after a bit of my time with my ferret, Apple, I would love to tell you more based off my personal experience so that I include what I have learned.

Before you ask, no I did not adopt Apple primarily due to my mom wanting a baby due to various reasons that can only make sense to her so no, I can’t explain anything more than that. However, we also did not buy from PetSmart or PetCo as I personally am very against both companies and hate the treatment that they give their precious animals. It saddens me that such big companies could just kill an animal and yes, I do realize that some of the stores are an exception but it also disgusts me that they do not do any research nor do they have any knowledge of their animals from my experiences at the store.

Instead, we went to a small shop near where I live that sells a lot of different animals but is not a big name company and gets all of their animals from various breeders locally. I love this place for a variety of reasons, for every employee they have done specific research and each specialize in a few different animals showcased in the store.

I spoke with one of the ferret experts who had previous experiences with ferrets as they had four for themselves in the past and gave me a few amazing tips about them and even helped up get their necessary equipment. They explained to me that at 8 weeks old, they get a shipment of ferrets every couple of months which is really helpful for them as they run out of ferrets very quickly and I was incredibly lucky because when I bought Apple on June 8th, 2017, they had gotten their shipment of ferrets yesterday so my gorgeous little Apple was born on April 12th, 2017.

Because of this, I really wanted to share my love for the store called Friendly Pets which is located in Greensboro, North Carolina but beyond that, I really wanted to talk about Apple who is currently sleeping on my chest as I am typing this.

Apple was in a group of about 5 ferrets at the store and no, I did not get more than one ferret however despite this, when I first saw him, I was immediately fascinated by him. In a group of five ferrets, they were all sleeping and the four were all lying on top of each each and cuddling except for him. He was curled up in a ball sleeping and he was the only one I could reach because of the large glass surrounding them.

When I got an assistant to help me pick him up because I could reach him too well, all I could do was pet him and I was scared to try and pick him in fear of hurting him since I didn’t have a good grip and when I held him, he immediately woke up and starting climbing onto my shoulder to check out the people behind me and started licking my neck and hands and it was the cutest thing ever and I knew from that moment that he was my ferret.

During the car ride home, he ended up going to the bathroom in the box they put him in so he got really upset and wanted out so when I took him out, he immediately started laying in my arms and sleeping and on the way home, we had to stop by Dollar General because we were missing litter and a few other items for him and I really wanted to pick it up so instead of putting him in the box again, I carried him inside and he was so calm. Like he woke up a bit and was looking around but he made absolutely no attempt to get out of my arms.

When we got home, I think he was finally ready to start playing because he started running around the living and looking for things to go into and stuff like that but when my mom and I finally got the cage perfected and I put some of his toys inside the age as well as his very own blanket, he went inside, used the litter box and went straight to sleep but obviously, a little while later he woke up so I let him play around in my room since there is absolutely nothing for him to climb inside and immediately he found a big bouncy ball that has like all the continents and stuff on it and starting pushing it around with his nose.

So here are a few thing that I have already noticed about him and things that I already know I need to work on and even things that I love. The first thing that I did notice was that he does have a bit of a biting problem, it is not remotely hard or mean and you can tell it is only play biting. I want to watch a few more videos on this topic because for the type of person who is never truly done researching.

Right now, what seems to work saying, “No!” and putting my hand up which seems to be working relatively well but I want to look it up a bit more to see if  I can find anymore tips and tricks.

Another thing that I have noticed that I feel really grateful for is the fact that he is already litter box trained. The second he had to go to the bathroom, he immediately started looking for a litter box and used it in seconds and he even seems to like the box itself. You definitely need to get a litter box that your ferret can put all four of his feet inside as he seems to really like putting all of his feet inside.

Beyond the biting, which I am confident and patient enough, I thoroughly believe that Apple is an amazing pet and I am already proud to be an amazing mother to him and I adore the fact that he enjoys sleeping in my arms as much as he does.

Sorry for the really bad picture quality (and how bad I look) but I really wanted to share the picture of him laying in my lap and please also excuse how bad I look. Just enjoy how cute Apple truly is.

Apple and I -3 .jpgFerret


A Letter to My Mom

Dear mom,

This is probably the millionth version of the same letter, a letter that I desperately wanted to write and post today and weirdly enough, it has been the hardest thing for me to ever write. Mostly because our relationship has lasted for 17 years and hopefully a million more to go.

You know what our relationship has consisted of more than anyone besides myself, you were the one cheering for me in the stands when I was throwing around Pom- Poms and watching me proudly as I stood behind a table with a buzzer. You helped me through my dyslexia, ensuring to make me read everything before school started because you wanted to see me excel.

It is everything that I am, everything that I was, and everything that I will be that is credited to you. All of my powers and my skills and dreams are because you were there for me when no one else was.

You supported me through the rough times, talked me through my drama and my struggles and gave me advice even though I didn’t totally listen to you. You pushed me through things that I wasn’t strong enough to do, where I was too fearful to agree and too weak to understand.

You were there, holding me when I cried and supporting me with my decisions and knew that sometimes I didn’t think with my brain and you ensured that I did sometimes. I know that everything that has ever happened and that everything that will happen is in honor of you.

I remember a conversation that breaks my heart every single time I think about it, not the one that shattered my heart completely but one from a few years ago. We were at a family member’s house and you were talking to somebody about how we were close and you explained that it was because you were the only one that had never left me. Which is still true to this day. It was so small and insignificant to you and it should have been to me but randomly, especially when I lose a friend, it crosses my mind and I thank the world that you are still there for me.

I know that next year, I will be starting my life at a University and that you won’t be there for me as much and that you won’t be there to help me make my decisions but I know that you’ll be a phone call away, that I can call you and talk to you about my life and keep you updated on the cute boys that I met and the friends that I might have made.

It is because of the promise of a phone call away that I know I will be okay because you are the only person in the last 17 years that I can 100% trust in my life. Mom, I know that we fight and that sometimes we say things we really don’t mean but I also know that I love you so much because you’re my mother and you are the only person I want when I don’t feel well.

I love you and I always will,

Your daughter.

The Letter to My Future Children

Hello my lovely children,

Right now, I am nearing the end of my teenage years and I have absolutely no intention of having a child any time soon but I also know that the wise, wise words of adults will never be listened to if I told them then rather than now.

In fact, I am not even sure you’re going to listen to me anyways. Right now, the year is 2017 and I can only imagine your reaction to hearing your 17 year old mother tell you a single word that I want to say.

I have no idea what our relationship is, I imagine it to be rather similar to my relationship with your grandmother but I honestly have no idea. I would hope we were close, one of which where you can trust me with anything you have to say.

I know what it is like to be a teenager, the drugs, the alcohol, the sex, and so much more that comes along with being a teenager and I can only hope that you trust me enough to tell me about the things going in your life.

I don’t want to be the mother that tells you never to drink alcohol, the one to tell you never to do drugs, nor will I be the one to lecture you on the dangers of sex because there are dangers but I trust that you already know them.

However, I do want to make sure you’re safe so if I ever wig out because you were at a party drinking, it is only because I know the dangers of what could happen. Drinking while driving, taking drinks from strangers, and so much more. If you are to do any of these things, I need to know you trust me and will call regardless of the time of day or the reason behind it. If your designated driver even takes one drink, I urge you to call me or if you happen to do drugs, I urge you to be careful and only do them around those you truly trust.

Trust is such a hard thing to come by as you’re surrounded by people who are not genuine and probably have no idea, this is the time of exploring and learning of yourself and the world around you so I know your trust may be misguided, or directed towards the wrong person but there is always a reason behind these things.

Between the mistakes of that jerk best friend or the scorned relationship with that guy, I know that it probably seems hard to trust anyone but I think that is the beauty of having a good relationship with your mother. My example would be my mother and I. We are close and I know that I can tell her anything regardless of what happens which is so important because in the mass of mistrust, it is amazing to have someone you do trust.

Of course, don’t let it seem like you can’t trust anyone at all. Friends are amazing and can be some of the most amazing people in the world for you to lean on, regardless of the relationship with me.

Merlin, I think of all the things I could tell you. I wonder which ones you would listen to, like how I already know I love you, even though I probably (most definitely) have not met your father nor am I remotely pregnant with you but I know I love you.

I also know that at some point, your love will extend to some random cutie. Whether it is a girl or a boy, regardless of whatever gender you are. I want you to know that love is love and I refuse to take away from your romance so please, love who you love and know that I will only be upset if you hide your love from me. I love you no matter what, I just want to know about you.

As for your relationship with your father, I wish I could give you advice on that but I never had a father. I had a step father but he was not my father and I really, really hope you’re closer to him than I was to him. I hope you don’t have to hide in your room to get away from him, that you don’t have to listen to degrading or disrespect on your part, regardless of how you treat him.

Your first boyfriend – Ensure that you know him, you don’t want a 4 minute relationship that will just give you a bad reputation. Make sure you give that title to someone special, you will always remember them.

Your first kiss – You imagine something super romantic, the type of kiss that has a leg pop or where you feel fireworks and while yes, you will always remember it regardless of whether you want to forget it. It will not be perfect, it might hurt your lips from the force (if it’s sudden) , it might be way too wet, or too much tongue. So many possibilities but sweetie, it does get better.


There Will Not Be a Santa Claus in My Home.


Hello guys,


So I have written poems about this large, red clothed man that goes by the name of Santa Claus and lives in the North Pole. I am not going to deny that as a child, I was not grown up  raised to believe in this mythical man who would grant all my wishes. I was introduced this man and I was a believer.


In fact, as a child, during those years when children were beginning to realize the truth, I was still holding onto the belief. My mother fondly tells a story of one Christmas when I wrote a letter to Santa.


I asked him for a bell from a Reindeer, a picture of Santa, and some other stuff in my attempt to prove Santa was real. I even put the letter into the mail box so that mom wouldn’t find it but she did.


That Christmas, I had all of my wishes fulfilled from that letter and for awhile, I whole heatedly believed it was true until I found the letter in her drawer one day. I was so mad, mad at mom, mad at myself. The truth hit me full force and while I do understand why she did this, she wanted me to continue believing just a little while longer, I was still upset.


As time went by, I realized more reasons as to why Santa was a harsh lie to every child in the world. It promised that you would get all of your gifts on your wish list and while I was fortunate enough for this to happen, a lot of children were not.


I do not want my child to believe in something only for her to be hurt when I can not fulfill this gift. For example, there is this ridiculous gift called a hatchimal that a lot of children put on their wishlist and it has come to where all of the stores have run out of it forcing people to turn to hatchimals that are being sold for $400-600 dollars and that is not something I would ever spend my money on.

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The idea of not giving my child something saddens me but if someone believes in Santa they are going to believe that they are going to get everything on their wishlist because they were a good kid. I do not want my kid to feel as though she wasn’t good enough to get a gift from Santa when other kids might get it.


Besides the fact that I don’t want my child to be hurt by a fictional character, I also want to promote Christmas as a holiday supporting family and friends where we thank them for being apart of our lives. I want to promote Christmas as an event that says,


The trees, the decorations, and the gifts will all be apart of my family’s Christmas but Santa Claus will never be. I want my children to understand that their gifts are from their family and not some “fictional guy” who will probably hurt them in the end.

I understand that their friends will hear of Santa Claus and I will come up with something when that time comes but there will not be a Santa Claus in my home.

17 Things I Love


Hey guys! So I wrote this a little bit in advance but today is December 7th, 2016 meaning that I have been alive for 17 years! So in honor of this, I wanted to tell about 17 things that I love. These things rang from television shows, book series, hobbies, foods, and absolutely whatever else that I can think of.

This list is in no particular order.


  1.  Writing!

I have been obsessed with writing for as long as I can remember! With my dyslexia, you would think it started after but that is actually not the case. I have always really liked the idea of storytelling and when I was struggling through dyslexia and all of that, I have a vivid memory of writing this story about two girls from very different worlds finding out they are sisters. Like a celebrity and a normal person, a princess and a commoner. I have no idea what I was wanting to do with the story but I had written out they met more than 30 times and I was constantly drawing pictures for this story (even though I sucked at drawing!)

However truly writing didn’t come to me until much later and my love for writing and my interest in the pursuit of writing was a long process. However, I began writing poetry in the fourth grade (so like 2009-2010) when we had this class in the library about what poetry was and what haiku’s were and so much more and I just fell in love.

I dedicate my love for poetry to Mrs. Wilson who worked in the library at my middle school.

During the summer of going into 6th grade, I was taken into the world of fan fiction (which will be delved into deeper in another spot!) and I began to read it obsessively on this website that was called Quizazz but later changed to Quotev.

On this website, I wrote two stories that were original. My story about Dyslexia (published on February 3rd, 2014) and another story about a train that is no longer published. During this time, beyond these stories, I also obsessively wrote my own fanfiction that would later be published on Wattpad (via thinking that Quotev was officially too childish and I had ran out of fan fiction!)

Many, many, many attempted stories later would result in the Social Butterfly which is still my pride and joy for the fan fiction part of my life however I ultimately gave it up when I began pursuing The White Butterfly which I began writing in 2015 and on Christmas Eve of that same year,  I finished it.

Before The Social Butterfly, however, I knew that I wanted to be a writer and my biggest problem was honestly just getting my story out there and being motivated enough to write it.

In the seventh grade ( so like 2012-2013), I met two people. A girl that I called Rainbow and who would become my favorite teacher of all time, Mrs. Thompson.

These two encouraged me in ways that I never believed and to this day, I thank them for thinking of writing as a profession rather than just an interest. They also convinced me to submit my first poem into a poetry contest at my local library’s poetry contest (that I lost but I still loved the experience and continued!)

2. Harry Potter

Literally if you ask anybody that I know personally, they will tell you that I have an obsession with this series. Which is one hundred percent true because while I hate the character with a passion, I love the world and other characters. I love that there is so much to debate about the series and it isn’t even the magical portion of this series that I love, what I love is that she put so much thought into this series that I could write history books about these various topics that have nothing to do with stupid Harry James Potter.

I had always kinda loved Harry Potter, as a child my brother was never home a lot and he was really important to me as a kid and I began to love the series because I associated him with the series.

However, it was not until I got hurt (I don’t remember how) and I had a lightning bolt cut on my forehead, similar to the character itself which caused me to research the series more which introduced me to Harry Potter fan fiction.

Of course, my interest in the series has changed a lot varying from Harry himself to Draco Malfoy (marry me?) to the teachers to the Marauder Era, light versus dark, the parallels to the real world and the series, and so much more.

3. Coffee

Okay so ever since I was little, coffee was like heaven from above. My mom would only let me have one cup of coffee every couple of months in these super tiny tea cup with teddy bears on them.

As I grew older and my mom stopped caring how much coffee I have had, the magical powers that I associated with a kid continued.

4. Gilmore Girls.

This is a show that I have watched like 6 times, I even stayed until 3 a’clock in the morning (stupid Eastern time) in the attempt to watch A Year in the Life which I did manage to do (finishing at almost 11 a’clock!)

But beyond my obsessive habits with this show, I have become entranced with the mother- daughter relationships between Lorelai and Emily as well as Lorelai and Rory.

I have had my opinions of Paris Geller and I have rooted for Sookie and Jackson, I have screamed at Luke Danes for being an ass, and I have even created an all out shipping war. Team Logan, by the way though I am partial to Jess. Not Dean though, Dean sucks.

5. My Aunt’s Chocolate Chip Cookies.

No matter how many times I have attempted to recreate these little pieces of love that are my Aunt’s chocolate chip cookies, I have failed epically. I am convinced that my Aunt has some sort of magical amazing powers that ensures that I must get down on my knees to beg for another one of the amazing cookies.

6. Corn Beef and Cabbage.

This has been a food that my mom has made on rare occasions from the day I was born. Unfortunately, the meal is not exactly cheap and more so, half my family hated the food until the divorce.

Regardless, this is an amazing food that I would kill somebody for (Not really..)

7. Disney / Pixar Movies.

These movies have always reminded me of childhood, of a time where I dreamed of a one true love and of a marriage so sweet and so pure. I dreamed of the life of Ariel as a child, I grew up to admire Belle for her individuality and love for books, and gradually became invested in the mechanics of the series.

The Pixar Theory by Jon Negroni that introduced me to my favorite YouTuber, SuperCarlinBrothers, where we analyzed the movies way too much to find connections and I have fallen in love with the movies all over again.

8. Wifi.

Oh wow, a teenager who loves wifi, how original.

Yes, I am seventeen years old and I love wifi so sue me! I love being able to talk to my friends at the drop of a hat, I love having access to the world at the tip of my fingers. I am oh so sorry that I am enjoying the world that is around me.

This is not something to judge teenagers for enjoying as I am ensure that when you were a teenager, you loved something that the adults hated. It’s how the world works, something new comes out that we love and those who lived in a world before it tend to hate it.

So yes, I love wifi.

9. Animals.

As a child, I grew up with this dog. I got her when I was three years old and I named her Fluffy though my mom claims that she told me that, at least apparently I said that but unless we live in the world, Life of Pets, I highly doubt that.

As a child, she was my favorite person in the world. She walked with me when we walked around the neighborhood, she stayed the night with me when I was scared of the dark, she listened to me rant about friend drama, and she even protected me when she didn’t like somebody.

She was my best friend and because of her, I had a love for animals that never really stopped. Unfortunately, she passed away over the summer.

As time went on, I found a love for sharks where I earned the nickname Sharky because I knew a lot of weird facts about them (which never really went away with some of my middle school friends) and it continued on even further to Llamas and Cows and Goats, Cats, and Fish.

Currently I have 8 fish : Zaniello, Casiopa, Lyra, Ursa, Oblegine, Denubla, Nunki, Altair.

2 Snails : Leafy and Sheldon.

I love them all deeply. ❤

10. Friends.

Friends have always been an important factor in my life and it is my friends who I believe have slowly molded me into who I am today. They supported me in my choices, relationships, and so much more that they all became so very important to me.

I even dedicated my last book, The White Butterfly, to my best friend but we are currently struggling but that doesn’t mean how much she meant to me has changed and I will forever appreciate her for that books existence because I wouldn’t have finished it without her.

11. Family.

Family has always been a weird topic for me because my family is weird but for this one, my family includes the people that have stuck with me through thick and thin because I don’t believe blood is what creates family and I definitely don’t think they are family just because they are blood.

Family, in my opinion, is someone who supports you in what you do and loves you for who you are regardless of your choices and opinions and life. That family, that is the family I love and I am so lucky that I have them in my life.

12. Blankets.

As much as I love the cold, blankets are amazing. The reason behind liking the cold is because you can always get warm by putting on thicker clothes and blankets but with being hot, your only option is getting naked and that isn’t exactly sociably acceptable and plus, it probably wouldn’t work anyways.

But anyways, back to blankets, they ensure warmth and security. They are soft and they are amazing and I just really love blankets.

13. The Smell of Cherries.

There is this hand soap and hand sanitizer at Bath and Body Works with the smell of Black Cherry Merlot which honestly just smells like cherries and it is amazing.

This has been a recent interest but literally anything cherry like has been absolutely amazing for me.

14. Music.

As a teenager, I have used music as getting people to not talk to me, I have jammed out to Insane Clown Posse, Theory of a Deadman, Blink-182, and even Smashing Pumpkins. I have hummed the music of Queen, Iron and Wine, and the Beatles. I have sang at the top of my lungs to Bob Marley, Radiohead, Death Cab for Cutie, and Elvis Presley.

I have listened to music during sadness and anger as well as love and happiness.

15. Books.

I have over 300 books.

Clearly, I have a thing for books. They make me feel like it is a getaway from everything going on and it is amazing. I love living from another person’s life.

16. Peppermint.

When I was in the seventh grade, I was absolutely and one hundred percent obsessed with peppermint, I had like 60 peppermints that year and everyone got them for me on my birthday and on Christmas.

Of course, I eventually got weaned off the peppermint, apparently 60 of them does that to you. But I have always remembered that year, that so many people remembered and noticed how much I love peppermint and they got it for me.

Peppermint means more than just the food or the amazing smell, it reminds me of caring and acknowledgment of me, myself, and I. That so many people noticed and cared.

17. Supporters / Fans

You guys, you guys are something that I absolutely love.

You guys have supported me, you have appreciated my work and I love you guys for it, thank you so much.

Career or Family?


In the question of choosing between my family or my career, I would choose my career. Family should be able to realize that your career is crucial as the career is how you would support them and I could never choose them over that. They are my family so no matter how much work you put into your career, they are still obligated to love you.  I can understand one’s decision to choose family however it is not the decision I would make and I think this decision is something that should be mentioned in relationships so they are aware of where they stand. If one were to marry somebody without knowing that they would constantly be working or doing something involving their work, it is common for a break up to ensue due to the lack of understanding. In every future relationship I will be in, this choice is something I would make prevalent early in the relationship rather than later.

I believe that it is important to balance your career and family but in the end, I do believe that one’s career should exceed. One’s career is something that you go through twelve or more years of school and it seems illogical to choose your family over something that you have spent more than a decade of your life to reach. In any career, life is constantly changing and the working environment is constantly in motion and one should make sure that they keep up and in order to excel in your career, you should choose career over family.

My choice to choose my career is not over a lack of wanting a relationship but in my personal opinion, it is the most logical choice out of the two. I would hope to find myself able to balance the two but this would be the choice I would make if I were forced to. In addition, relationships have been declining and in a recent study, The State of Our Unions 2011, it has been recorded that only 60% of people are even happy in their relationship so why would I choose them over my career, something I love, which could very well fail anyways.

If one were to ask somebody if they would like to work more hours for more money or less hours for less money like the study at Cornell University, it is shown that many people would choose the same answer as me although unknowingly. While this was not in consideration of family or home life, it is implied in the answer and the fact that an average of them chose more work for more money proves that I am not the only person who would choose this. In the same study, they asked if they regretted choosing work over happiness and only 24% of them said “yes.” (Cornell.edu. Par. 6.)

Alex Blackie wrote a heart breaking article on The Guardian called ‘I couldn’t have it all’ – choosing between my career and my family. In this article, she talks about the fact that she had a family before she started her career and that at one point, her daughter said “Mummy, I don’t recognize you anymore.” (Par. 1) This is something that is heart breaking as she dreamed of being “the perfect mother” however this is not a dream that I have. I dream of making a good career for myself so I have a hard sympathizing with this concept. I wholeheartedly support her decision in stepping back from her career and being more involved with her family, however I wonder if it was really a wise decision. Clearly she was making it big in her career and while she was unhappy because of her family, she was proud of her achievement with her job and choosing to step back may have taken away her chance of doing well in her career.

While I perfectly understand the choice between family and career and choosing family, it is not something that I would do. The likely of the relationship salvaging no matter what along with my goals in life not paralleling with my family but my career, I would choose my career in a heartbeat.


Works Cited

“Facts and Figures.” For Your Marriage. Web. 28 July 2016.

“When Opting for Happiness or Income, Many Go for the Cash | Cornell Chronicle.” When

Opting for Happiness or Income, Many Go for the Cash | Cornell Chronicle. Web. 28 July 2016.

“‘I Couldn’t Have It All’ – Choosing between My Child and My Career.”The Guardian. Guardian

News and Media, 20 Apr. 2013. Web. 28 July 2016.